Small
It was a dark and dreary December
night. It was that weekend mid December when Christmas parties hadn’t quite got
going yet, but Christmas concerts and productions were in full swing. A few
fiestas were already on the schedule.
I was headed to the church from one
party. I’d turned down an invite to a Christmas concert with friends because it
was the last small group of the semester with my ninth grade girls. A couple
hours before, I’d started getting text messages from my students, bailing for
one reason or another: school, homework, school. More than likely they didn’t
want to go out. It was cold. It was rainy. I got it.
But it was still a little frustrating
to have them cancel with only a few hours to spare. I could have made plans. I
could have gone to that concert. I could be home in my bed watching Netflix.
The sixth girl canceled on my way
to the church. That only left one girl whom I hadn’t heard from. But Aubrey was
sure to show up. She always showed up. She was always early and she was always
the last to leave. She didn’t attend the church but came to youth group and
small group, tagging along with her best friend.
Aubrey was incredibly quiet and
barely said two sentences during any given small group. Usually her words consisted
of asking prayer for her dog, Mitchens, who always seemed to have one ailment
or another.
I pulled
over on the side of the road and texted Aubrey the state of things. I asked her
if she wanted to cancel, or, if she wanted, I could swing by and pick her up
for coffee. Please cancel. Please cancel,
I muttered to myself as I waited for her to reply. I might still have time to
make it to that concert.
The reply
came back instantly. “I want to get coffee,” she said.
“Be there
in 10 minutes,” I replied. Okay, we’re
doing this, I thought.
I arrived
at Aubrey’s. I’d never been to her house. I went inside and waited for her to
find her coat. I chatted with her parents, who I usually waved to through the
car window as they were driving away after fetching Aubrey from youth events. I
pet Mitchens, the dog I’d heard so much about. He seemed in good health on this
December evening.
Aubrey and
I grabbed coffee. Actually, we both got hot chocolate because Aubrey didn’t
like coffee and I didn’t want the caffeine that late in the evening. I
seriously had no idea what we were going to talk about when I first picked her
up, but Aubrey seemed to find her voice box the moment we were in the car. She
talked about books and weird science fiction but also informed me she had
dyslexia. I thought this was strange: I have two siblings with dyslexia and
neither one of them like to read very much.
Then she
showed me how to download this app from the library where you could reserve
audio books. Aha. That’s how she reads so much.
We finished
up and I took her home. I stopped in to say Merry Christmas to Mitchens, then
drove home through the rain. I marveled how one 45-minute hot chocolate
one-on-one had revealed a layer to Aubrey’s life that small group had never
opened. She’d come alive as we nerdily swapped favorite book stories and found
a common love in Harry Potter.
Over a year
later, this moment came back to me. I’m living in a different city, working
with a different group of teens and preteens. Our tiny middle school ministry
is a vibrant and lively oasis in a big city full of young, ambitious
professionals. Sometimes I wonder, is it worth it? There are only a few kids.
Maybe, that time would be better spent somewhere else...
Then I
think of Aubrey. It was a small moment with just 2 people. But it was pivotal.
I felt like I’d discovered Aubrey. It had taken a while, but we’d finally met.
I had the privilege of finding beauty beneath all the silence.
The next
time our small group met, Aubrey was as quiet as ever. Her sweet spot was never
more than 2 or 3 people. That was okay. But I knew if I ever used a Harry
Potter illustration, I could count on Aubrey to back me up. I knew I could look
at her across the room and she’d know exactly what I was talking about.
Sometimes the small moments are
actually pretty epic.
(Names used are not the real names)