One Thing About White Men That Annoys Me
(Based on a true story)
I figured out one thing that annoys me about most white men (and the reason I'm on a hiatus from any resources, materials, or teachings created by white men): They say things that are opinion as if they are facts.
Example (typical white male vernacular): "The second season of The Walking Dead was terrible. The writers should have written better material." He says this as a statement of fact when it's something that can only be the speaker's opinion (art is subjective, after all).
An example of a way to convey the same information as an opinion, rather than a fact: "I don't like the second season of The Walking Dead. I wish the writers had written different material."
Why does this matter? Because in saying, "The second season of The Walking Dead was terrible. The writers should have written better material" the speaker is declaring that the season is (for a fact) terrible, therefore anyone who thinks differently is stupid. Anyone with a differing opinion is placed in the position of choosing not to speak, or potentially engaging in an argument.
However, if one were to share their opinion: "I don't like the second season of The Walking Dead. I wish the writers had written different material" it's inclusive and perhaps invites conversation. I might respond to such a statement with, "That's interesting. Why didn't you like it? And what do you wish the writers would have done differently?" If someone has a different opinion, they are less likely to become defensive or feel like they have to keep quiet.
The White Male Vernacular that declares opinions as if they are facts is exclusive and elitist. It ostracizes and begins wars. It puts people down, even over the smallest things.
Some white men are aware of this posture, but they haven't yet learned how to speak inclusively. These men still use the same vernacular, they just qualify it by saying something like, "But you can think whatever you want." This is equally bad. It is the white man giving the other person permission to disagree, when that person does not need the white man's permission to have their own opinion. Free thought and a right to our own opinions is granted to every human—not just the ones to whom the white man bequeaths it.
Since my hiatus from teaching materials created by white men, I find I am now drawn to teachers, speakers, and influencers who are open to sharing their opinions in an inclusive way, in a way that invites conversation. The person who dogmatically declares opinions as facts may present as polished; they may come across as an expert (to some). But it comes at the cost of creating followers rather than friends. Starting wars, rather than building community.
But that's just my opinion.